The Beautiful Nightmare, when a Black girl cuts her hair

Whether it be by choice or force, the stigma about natural black hair is that it doesn’t grow and/or that it’s nappy, and hard to maintain. I will admit the stigma can be true, if you, one, don’t know how to properly maintain natural hair; and, two, if you’re not willing to take the time to maintain your natural hair. But the real truth of the matter is natural black hair is utterly the most unique hair texture in the world, and unlike any other hair type [in the world] it can be manipulated and mimic any style imaginable. Natural hair is versatile. Natural hair is beautiful. Natural hair is exactly what God intended our hair to be!

Natural hair comes in all shapes, sizes and textures. And despite the partially true stiga, natural hair has the potential to grow toward unbelievable lengths and is plain beautiful despite.cuts hair

[Fast forward] although we all may cut our hair for different reasons and ultimately have different lifestyles, etc. When a black girl cuts her hair, it is huge step. Even though at the end of the day it’s just hair. There is no doubt that when a black girl cuts her hair, there are a few phases we share together.

Phase 1) Desire. Every ideal starts with a dream. And then a dream turns into a desire. Prior to your “big chop”, you have already made a decision that you are going to cut your hair! You don’t know when. You don’t quite know how. You haven’t actually told yourself yet. But the desire itself has developed. You find yourself daydreaming about potential new hair styles for yourself. You may even experience dreams of your hair already being cut. But this is no magic, or premonition – just the human brain’s self consciousness at work.

Phase 2) Indecision. Before you decide to cut your hair, you find yourself contemplating whether or not you are actually going to take the “big chop” step. You may find yourself going back and forth. You may openly discuss your desire with others. You ask for the opinions of others. All along you have already decided in your heart that you are going to cut your hair.

Phase 3) Commitment. You have finally told yourself your decision. I am going to cut my hair! You have started taking the steps needed to cut your hair – making sure you have a good pair of earrings, check. Eyebrows are arched, check. Lip gloss popping, check. All the necessities to guarantee you don’t look manley. You may decide to cut your hair yourself. Or, you have already set an appointment with your hair stylist.

Phase 4) Completion. So you cut your hair, girl! Oh my goodness! You really did it. You go girl! Everyone around you is in shock, they can’t believe you did it. And for the next couple of weeks you find yourself repeatedly answering (2) questions: Why did you cut your hair and What are you going to do with it?

Phase 5) Relief. At this point you feel pretty good. Something about cutting your hair is something like a release. You feel accomplished. You think you are ready for this journey, don’t you.

Phase 6) Regret. You look into the mirror and notice your hair is gone! Oh my goodness. What did I do? Am I dreaming? You now feel a sense of incompleteness. You question your intentions. You ask yourself if you made the right decision.

Phase 7) Reality. The truth of the matter has set in, and you have decided to go with the flow. You are definitely in what some like to call “the ugly stage”.

Phase 8) Frustration. Things’ in your hair-life are not quite like you imagined. Some days are good, some days are plain “ bad hair days”. You are googling out the haywire, trying to find ideas for your hair. You are experimenting with different hairstyles and products. Sometimes you may even feel unpretty.

Phase 9) Acceptance. You realize that like any other change in life, it takes readjustment. You are getting used to your new look. You find some techniques and regimens that are working well, even though you’re not quite where you wonna’ be.

Phase 10) Embrace. Finally you are embracing your hair, the good and the bad. You are learning more about your natural hair everyday. You are enjoying the pleasure of watching your hair grow and/or the style manifest into something beautiful. Things are uphill from here. You are a natural sista and plain just rocking it!

*Disclaimer: Not everyone will experience any or all of these phases, but I believe a lot of us do.

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